I have the best friends!

It hit me today how amazing my friends are. Yes, that hits me quite often, but today in particular. I got a few texts from Renay today as Matt got on the road talking about how sad she was that he was leaving. And it made me really sad too. Sad for what Matt was leaving behind. Of course I'm ecstatic that he's on his way here to be with me. It's something I've been waiting for for a long time. Thinking about all of this made me think though of how much some of my friends mean to me. Like Renay for instance. I would've never met Matt if it weren't for Renay. And Renay is one these people that I can talk about whatever I want to and she'll listen. And I try to do the same for her, but fail totally at times. This is going to sound weird to anyone else, but Thank you for Matt, Renay...I promise you I'll take good care of him :) If I don't, you can burn all of my books, make evil wishes on me with magic pony tails, and do some sort of voodoo to bring on heavy hurricanes. In the meantime, there's always a place for you here :)

Then I got texts from my friend DJ today who I've been SOOOO out of touch with that it's just embarrasing at this point. He asked me how the move went and how I'm liking Mandeville and told me he was really happy for me, and that really meant a lot to me. Over the years, I've just fallen so out of touch with so many people that ti's really just sad. And I hate that. These were the people that I grew up with and formed myself with. I told DJ today that we totally need to have a reunion of those old people and I'm so serious about it! We really should!!

Then to top all of this off, I came home to a package waiting for me at my doorstep. It was from Pat, AKA, Deslily, AKA Mom2. For all who wonder why I call Pat "Mama", it is not because she is my mom or because I look at her as a mom :p It's a joke between us that started a long time ago when we discovered many similarities between us. She mentioned that I could be her son more than her own children could be, lol. So since then, I've unofficially become her son :p I opened this box and inside was an incredibly sweet note to me and Matt which brought tears to my eyes which kept flowing as I saw the rest of the contents. She made me everything she sent by hand. She made me a couple of crocheted potholders and a couple of crocheted trivets:

And then there is this beautiful afghan that she made for us!! I already have one that she made for me that has long been my favorite blanket and this one will now join that one :) In fact, I had been using the old one on the sofa which is now by my feet as I'm covered with the new one she sent me :p I swear she has SO much talent!!! She needs to sell some of this stuff that she makes on Etsy or something!!!! If you've ever held a "Pat piece" in your hands, you know what I mean!

Then there are all of the countless words of support that I've gotten from everyone throughout this whole process!! I can't thank you all enough. I really do have the best friends. It wasn't easy coming out in the first place, but I've gotten nothing but support from everyone and no one's treated me any different at all...even my amazing family. And that's what I was afraid of...that even if people accepted it, that they would treat me as a different person. And I haven't seen any of it. I guess this post is a big thank you to each and every one of you reading this whether you comment here or not. Because even if you don't comment here and I don't know that you read this, you've taken this journey with me to get to where I am. And this is sort of the pinnacle of that journey. Matt will be arriving in about an hour and he's staying for good this time :)

Making Tea and Saving Herbs

I ended up with quite a few requests yesterday after my post of people asking me how to make your own tea! It's really so freaking simple!! I swear guys...it's really easy. The hardest part is picking the herbs off of the stems :p

Step one is growing your own herbs. I think an herb garden is the most rewarding garden of them all and it's probably the easiest garden of them all. I won't say herbs are care-free, but they're about as carefree as you get. Certain herbs like mint are near impossible to kill and they'll take over if you're not careful!! A warning to the herb growing novice, ALWAYS plant mint in a pot or container. If you don't you will have a lawn full of it. Which is kind of wonderful, but not something that everyone wants :p

Pick herbs that you like! If you just want herbs for tea, so really good ones are mints, lavender, lemon balm, lemon verbena, chamomile...some people get brave and make tea with basil, but it's not a flavor I'm crazy about. Then of course there are some wonderful savory herbs to cook with! Like rosemary, thyme, lemon thyme, parsley, oregano, marjoram, tarragon, chives, cilantro...the list goes on and on!

You can grow these in a raised bed, in containers, or just plant them right in the ground with your other plants. Plant them in ball jars on your windowsill and just snip them whenever you need them for cooking. Nothing beats the taste of fresh herbs for cooking!!

 If you're wanting to make tea, you're going to have to dry your herbs. There are many many different ways of doing this. You can hang them with a clothes pin in the sun, put them in the microwave, bake them at a low heat, but what I do is cut what I want, put them in a paper bag and punch holes in the bag and leave them in a warm place (I put them in my mom's garage) for about a week. This is the best method I've found for really dehydrating them well and keeping their flavor.

 Then, you just strip the dried leaves from their stems and then crumble the leaves into the consistency you want your tea leaves to be! You can make a tea of just one herb or of a combination :) And there really is no guide as to how much of which...just put however much of whatever you want! And that's it!! It's that simple. Clip your herbs, dry them, and crumble them together. Then get yourself a tea infuser and steep it in water or you can even buy tea bags and stuff them if you really want to.

 I also had some questions about where I got my jars from that I'm storing my dried herbs in! I got them from World Market and I absolutely LOVE them!! I bought two sets :) And they're super affordable! A pack of four for $3.99. They have shaker tops with two different size holes too. If you don't have a world market by you, you can order them on their website :) Highly recommended!! I love my little jars!!

I'm going to go ahead and link this post up to Beth Fish's Weekend Cooking post too!

Busy being domestic

I figured I might as well post about SOMETHING since I haven't been reading much lately. Though I have to say I've finally found a few things that seem to be holding my attention. I just have entirely TOO many books right now that I'm in the middle of. I hate it so much when I let that happen. I end up never finishing any of them. But I'm focusing on three for now! Of course there's The Stand by Stephen King that I'm reading for Trish's Standalong. That's what's going on on the Nook right now. Then I finally found a print book to grab me..that one is Blood Wounds by Susan Beth Pfeffer..love her! And this one is really good. And then Heather convinced me to listen to the audio of Jenny Lawson's Let's Pretend This Never Happened and OMG it's hilarious!!!

Aside from reading, I'm making my apartment a home right now. Matt is coming in this week!!! For good!!! I'm so freaking excited about this that I can barely contain myself. There won't be any goodbyes this time. He's staying for good! I still don't think that's really sunk in for either one of us. I think we're still both in the "this is just another visit" mode. But it's starting to hit us now I think and wow it's an amazing feeling.

My mom's coming up tomorrow to spend the day with me and go shopping and go eat and go visit the local nursery. Yes guys, I have a nursery literally WALKING distance from my apartment!! This is SO dangerous!! But wonderful. I'm going to go pick up some herbs tomorrow. I have some vegetables planted in containers outside. I'll try to get some pictures this weekend. But no herbs...I took some herbs from my mom's house and dried them and put them in these wonderful little jars that have shaker tops. Love them!

I also made my own tea!!! Yes!! It's so good guys!! I love the idea of growing things and taking it directly from the ground and turning it into something you can cook with or drink. Yes, I know this is what we've done for centuries, but it just never becomes less amazing. The tea I made is a mixture of lavender buds, various mints and lemon balm that I dried and then mixed together! I made so much of it! I put some in this little jar and it just looks so pretty :)

I got myself a couple of houseplants too :) I wanted a tall plant for this one corner in the living room and found this dracaena with ivy around it's base for an incredibly low price and couldn't pass it up! I think it's so pretty!!

And while I was there, I found a little potted calla lily that I couldn't pass up either. Calla lilies are Matt's favorite flowers/plants, so I picked this one up for him :) It's putting out some beautiful little lilies right now.

What's everyone else been up to?? I've missed everyone SO FREAKING MUCH!! Tell me how you've all been!

Still to come in 2012

I was talking to Kelly last night after she wrote up her post on what she's looking forward to for the rest of 2012 and I was telling her I still have quite a few preorders I'm expecting for the rest of the year!! I always LOVE reading posts on what people are excited about for the rest of the year so I thought I'd write up my own :) Here are the books that I actually have preordered and which I'm VERY MUCH looking forward to!!

The Brides of Rollrock Island by Margo Lanagan - NEW FREAKING MARGO LANAGAN!!! And SELKIES!!!! Ever since closing the cover to Tender Morsels I've been dying for another Margo Lanagan novel...cannot WAIT for this one to come out!!

Every Day by David Levithan - This book sounds so freaking good. A book that completely challenges gender. About a person simply named or called A throughout. No "him" or "her". It's about a person who wakes up in a different person's body every day. I always love seeing where Levithan goes next with his novels.

UnWholly by Neal Shusterman - The sequel to Unwind which may be one of my favorite dystopian novels that I've read. This is easily one of my most anticipated books!!

The Cookie Dough Lover's Cookbook by Lindsay Landis - Well this one is all Trish's fault :p She mentioned it on twitter and it sounded too fabulous to pass up so I preordered it :p

American Grown by Michelle Obama - The first lady's book on the white house kitchen garden along with stories from all over the nation on urban gardening, the new movement of organic gardening and so much more!! I love what Michelle Obama has done for raising food awareness and sustainable practices and healthy eating practices!! Can't wait to read this one!

The Last Dragon Slayer by Jasper Fforde - Can you believe that I've never read ANYTHING by him?? this one just sounds really good!

Adaptation by Malinda Lo - A new series by Malinda Lo!!! I still haven't read Huntress, but I really did love Ash!!! So I was super excited to see a new series from her :)

The Casual Vacancy by J.K. Rowling - Duh...I had to preorder this one :P This is one that I shall begin reading immediately upon receiving it!!! Of course it will be no Harry Potter, but I bet it will still be damn good.

The Elementals by Francesca Lia Block - Ms Block herself has said that she's more proud of this book than she has been of anything in a long time and that's saying a lot!! Because everything she writes is amazing!! Can't wait for this one :D

Unspoken: The Lynburn Legacy by Sarah Rees Brennan - Don't even remember what this one is about but I do remember it sounded good enough to order XD

Origin by Jessica Khoury - Sounds like a damn good dystopian novel!

The Tiny Book of Tiny Stories Vol. 2 ed. by Joseph Gordon Levitt - Just because I really LOVED the first one so much!!

Sweet Tooth Vol. 5 by Jeff Lemire - Because I have volumes 1-4 and I have to have volume 5 :p

The Unwritten Vol. 6 by Mike Carey - See above explanation :p

Dodger by Terry Pratchett - I really know NOTHING about this book! But it's new Terry Pratchett!!! And it can't be bad!!! Preordered!

A Wrinkle in Time: The Graphic Novel by Hope Larson - Isn't the title of that one enough to explain why I preordered it? It's Hope freaking Larson doing a graphic novel interpretation of A Wrinkle in Time. YES.

At the Mouth of the River of Bees: Stories by Kij Johnson - After reading The Fox Woman, I will by anything and everything that this beautifully talented woman writes!

The Long Earth by Terry Pratchett and Stephen Baxter - Yet another Pratchett and this one sounds incredibly freaking good!! Can't wait to get my grubby paws on it!

Earth Unaware (The First Formic War) by Orson Scott Card - I got so excited about the title of this book!!! A book about the First Formic War that is referred to over and over again in the Ender series. This better be good!

Ruins by Orson Scott Card - This is the sequel to Pathfinder which is a book by Card that I read last year and really really enjoyed! First book I've loved by him that much since Magic Street.

I know it's quite a bit but at the same time I haven't bought a book in a bookstore in probably 4 months now...So these are probably all I will buy this year...it's nice too :) when I find a book I know I'll want when it comes out, I preorder it and forget about it then it's a little present when it shows up in the mail! So my question to you is what am I forgetting here???

Trish's Read A Long of The Stand by Stephen King

I'm so in!! The lovely, amazing, beautiful Trish is hosting a readalong of The Stand by Stephen King and of course I have to join in! Why? I'll answer the questions to her meme to tell you why!

1. What makes you want to read The Stand? First and foremost, I want to read this book because it's my bestest friend Debi's FAVORITE BOOK!!!! And she's only been trying to get me to read it for five years now. Secondly, I actually started this book about two years ago, got 350 pages in and was loving it and for some reason never went back to it :/ So I'm super excited to actually read it this time!!

2. Describe your preconceived notions of The Stand? Well I'm a bit biased because I've read some of it but what I've read is AWESOME. I actually really like Stephen King and have loved pretty much every one of his books I've read. A lot of people call him a "guilty pleasure" author, but I just think he writes a damn good and entertaining novel!

3. What was the last scary(ish) book you read or movie you saw? Wow! Nothing this year! The last one was actually in October of last year and it was definitely nightmare inducing, but one of the best books I've read at the same time. Shadow Man by Cody McFadyen. I really need to catch up with that series. Horrifying in a "it could really happen and it's really fucking sick that it ever does happen" sort of way. Incidentally I also read this because of Debi :p

4. Which version of the book will you be reading from? I'll be reading the complete and uncut version on my Nook!

5. What are your previous experiences with Stephen King? As I said earlier, I really haven't read a book by him that I didn't like...except for Eye of the Dragon...not so good. My FIRST experience with him was one of my first novels actually. I read Misery in the sixth grade. I think I was 11 or 12 and believe it or not I got it from the Scholastic book order through school!! In a Catholic school nonetheless!! I was in love with that book. More recently I've read Lisey's Story and Cell and have loved them both. I particularly loved Lisey's Story...one of my favorite books I've read actually since I've been blogging. HAHA!! Ok...I just went back and read my Lisey's Story "review". It's just embarassing and not even a review. It's the first book I ever reviewed on this blog and I obviously did not consider myself a book blogger then...it was in 2007...I also found that I was talking about SparkPeople on that post!! I didn't even remember that site existed back then...I don't remember even hearing about it until recently from Amanda...funny how looking back on the past can be so jarring sometimes. One other fun piece of knowledge...when I was reading my review of Cell I saw that it was noted in my paperback of Cell that Stephen King didn't own a Cell phone at the time...I'd be curious to know if that's still true!

6. Anything else you'd like to add? Bonus points for being extra random. DAMN..I should've read this question before writing my response to the previous question....all those bonus points I missed out on....

Join in the fun!! It officially starts June 1st and goes for 9 weeks but I think I'll start tonight actually ;)

A New Chapter

 

Well, I did it. I moved into my very first apartment today, with Matt to join me in just a little over a week. I'm exhausted, I'm tired, I'm achy, I'm an emotional mess, but I couldn't be happier at the same time. Guys, I'm so in love with my little place. I really did find the perfect place to start my new life with Matt. It feels like me, it feels like us.

I knew from the time I found this apartment I would like it, but you don't really get a feel for a place until you move in, and I really lucked out finding this place. First of all, it's gorgeous. It's considered a "luxury apartment" but I think the price is really reasonable for what it is. It'll mean a commute to work, but that's fine because I'm in an area that I love. I go out onto my patio and hear quiet..solitude. No busy freeways, just birds chirping. And I see woods around me. The grounds are gorgeously landscaped. I have a gorgeous pool, a 24 hour gym that I have access to, a pond, tennis courts, a trail to walk around, so much more. 

The apartment itself is just so so..perfect. I can't think of another word. I've only been here for 17 hours and it feels so like home already. I have these gorgeous cement floors, 1200 square feet of space for me and Matt to make our own, a nice little kitchen, a fireplace and a beautiful little patio area that I can slowly make my own with some new plants :)

In fact, I think I may spend tomorrow getting some new plants for the patio before I have to go back to work on Monday. It was a very bittersweet day too. Of course, my mom and my sister and my brother came to help me move. I didn't realize exactly how hard it was going to be to say goodbye. I knew it wouldn't be easy but when it was time to actually say goodbye...to admit that this was now my home, not my mom's house..that was so hard on both of us. I'm getting teary eyed again just typing this. 

She gave me a bell that I've always loved when I left home today. It's a little silver bell that she was given when her and my dad got married and I've loved it since I was a kid. I gave her a journal for Mother's day that I filled out completely and mentioned in there how I had always loved it. When I was leaving tonight, she gave me the bell and told me she wanted me to have it. That just about killed me. Wasn't the easiest drive to my new "home". But I made it. 

I'm in a good place now. I think this will actually bring me and my mom closer. I know it will bring me and Matt closer...both physically and let us take the next step in our relationship. Things are coming together and I just couldn't be happier right now. I wanted to thank all of you for your continued support too. I've been a bit of a stranger this year. It hasn't been the easiest. Yet you've all stuck around and I can't tell you all how much that means to me. From the bottom of my heart, I mean that. 

I know not everyone goes on tumblr, but I wanted to let everyone know that I posted pics of the new place over there for those who were interested! I had to split them up into two separate posts. Here's part 1 and here's part 2! Hopefully I'll be around more now that things are settling into place. Hugs to you all!!

The Sleepy Hollow Family Almanac by Kris D'Agostino

Guess what guys? I FINISHED A BOOK!!! Yes this is a big deal for me. It's the first novel that I've finished since March. I had planned for this to be the year that I read 100 books finally, but life has other plans and that's fine. I'll go with what life says has to happen. And I can't really be mad at life when it gives me books like The Sleepy Hollow Family Almanac. It was really just what I've needed this last month.

I originally heard about this novel from Nancy, the Bookfool. And I love Nancy so much and some times she can just point me to a book that I just know I'll enjoy and this was one of those cases. Though I have to say that the opening line of the novel had me ready to just close the book and be done with it. But I'm glad I stuck with it. The book opens with it's narrator, Calvin, a guy in his mid-twenties, informing us "I work with retards." I'm sensitive to things like this. I currently work with people with mental illness. For seven years prior to that, I worked with people with physical disabilities and people with developmental disabilities such as mental retardation, autism and aspergers. To call them "retards" is a huge trigger to me to say the least.

What I quickly learned, though, is that this novel's focus is on the evolution of Calvin, a young guy who is disillusioned by his current place in the world, fairly immature, and jaded by his life and his family. Calvin does in fact work with people with developmental disabilities. He works specifically with a young boy named Arham who has autism who just stole my heart, and he works really well with him. When he's not at work, he's at home with a family that's a cast of characters of their own.

Calvin's father has cancer and walks around with a gun in his bathrobe stuck in a permanent depression and existential crisis, his younger brother is a narcissist focused on his looks and his body and how he can look good by doing good things, and his sister is probably the most normal in the family but manages to get pregnant as a young teen and sadly has to deal with that. Calvin's mother tries her best to keep her sanity throughout all of this while trying to keep their house, but it's a rare occasion when she's able to keep it together.

I really liked this one. I really did. It surprised me. This book could have been just another "mid twenties existential crisis novel filled with pop culture references," but it wasn't. There's not a whole lot of wry humor, though it's humorous enough if you're one for dark humor, there are no pop culture references just for "coolness' sake", there are no easy answers with a happy ending where graduation caps are thrown into the air.

D'Agostino gets it I think. I could definitely relate to Cal to an extent with my own experiences in my mid twenties...shoot, I can relate to him now! Overall, just a really good read and I can't wait to see what else D'agostino has in store for us in the future.

Ringing In 31

I went to bed last night dreading waking up 31 years old today. Not because I think I'm old. I know I'm not. I know I'm still young and I feel young. But the realization hit me that I'm no longer 30...that I'm IN my thirties now. And with that realization came the realization of how quickly life goes by and how precious life is. How sometimes you can feel like life is like a car speeding along and the brakes have gone out and you're just screaming "slow the fuck down!" but nothing you do can slow it down. But as the day went on, 31 became a much better number than what I thought I'd wake up to.

This year has been lousy so far. There's no other way to put it. I went into 2012 saying "This will be the year!!! Everything will be good!! Everything will change and things will be excellent!!!" And yes, there have been changes and things have been excellent, but a lot has been really lousy too. My dad's basically been in the hospital since the beginning of the year and is just now starting to get better, I haven't finished a book since March, I haven't seen Matt in I don't even know how long, work has been so awful, a lot of my friends are going through really rough times, I've been the worst friend in the world to those friends because of being so caught up in my own problems...it just hasn't been the best of years.

But today, I realized that there are so many good things about to happen. There are so many things in my life that I am so lucky to have. So many people surrounding me that make me feel like a damn lucky person. And turning 31 can be my new year...or better yet, a new start. Next weekend I'm moving into my very first apartment...and a couple of weeks later Matt is moving down with me. For good. No more long gaps of time between visits, only a couple of hours when we have to work separate schedules. I'm going to be in an area of town that I love. I get to start the next chapter of my life.

Talking to my mom about who I am has been so much easier. Coming out to her was a lot easier than I thought it would be, but there is still a bit of awkwardness there. And that's understandable. But I noticed today that a lot of that has already gotten easier. I can talk about Matt with her now without a second thought..I don't have to worry that I might make her feel uncomfortable. She's been so supportive and I'm just so lucky to have her.

Things are changing. Not just for me, but there's an air of change...that things are going to start getting better. I don't often talk politics on this blog. I don't think it's hard to guess my views, but I tend to keep them to myself. But I can't help but proclaim how proud I am of our president. I don't think he's been the most effective president in this first term of his, but he brought tears to my eyes by being the first president to stand for the right of everyone to marry who they want. I do believe that he is a good man with a good heart and sincerely wants this country and it's people to live in better circumstances. He gave me a lift that was greatly needed...it was a nice turn around for this year.

I guess I've just been reminded in these last few days of the good stuff surrounding me. It's easy to get bogged down in how awful everything is. I'm the king of it at times. But these last days have showed me the good in my life too. Me and my grandma share our birthday every year. Her birthday is May 10th, mine May 11th. I took this picture of her yesterday while we sang happy birthday to her for her 89th birthday and it has made my heart smile so much. It captures her spirit so well and I just can't stop staring at it. I think it's my favorite picture I have of my Grandma. Yet another reminder that things will get better. Here's to a new start!

This is how life has been....

Surprisingly not as bad as what I thought I'd be in for. I don't think I'm back for good yet, but I think the worst is behind me. Let's start with this week's Friday Fill In's, shall we?

 1. Ah, me...what a freaking week and a however many days it has been. I think I've had more life changes in the last two weeks than I have in all of my 30 years of life prior to that. Those are mostly good life changes though!
2. Change is what's on my mind most lately.
3. When I talk to my best friend, I truly feel a deep sense of relief and I don't know what I would do without her.
4. Peace, calm, quiet and time to myself is what's working for me lately when I can get it.
5. I recently saw the apartment of my dreams. And I put a deposit down on it!
6. Knowing that Matt will be here in just barely over a month fills me with joy!
7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to reconnecting a little bit with my blogging friends and just relaxing, tomorrow my plans include going to see dad at the hospital real quick before working from 3-11 at night and Sunday, I want to spend the day at the hospital with dad, maybe fit in some gardening, some shopping for the new place and definitely some reading time!

Change is certainly the theme of my break from blogging! Like I said in my last post prior to my "taking a break" post, I came out to my mom finally. And it really has been so freeing and stress reducing. I can't imagine what all this would be like right now with that still behind closed doors! And there have been plenty of steps forward taken. This is going in a good direction :) Today I went and saw the apartments that Matt and I will be living in and they are gorgeous! I'm so excited!! I put the deposit down too! Move in day will May 19th for me and fear not blogging friends (and Renay especially ;)), I got all the info I needed to get wireless set up the day of the move!!

The biggest thing in the last week has been dad's surgery. He had to undergo yet another major surgery, this making three in the last month, and he made it out once again like a champ. But not without scaring the living crap out of me first. He had a hard time getting off the ventilator this time and the first time I saw him he still had the breathing tube in and he was awake and it was just such a horrible sight :( Really freaked me out. He looked awful and it was so hard to see him like that. But today he is looking so much better and hopefully this is the end of the countless surgeries he's had and it's a new lease on life for him. I'm ready for it and I KNOW he has to be.

In the midst of everything I've read next to nothing. The one book I did finish though is a new favorite. It was very appropriate for this month, a beautiful book of poetry called What the Living Do by Marie Howe. I really can't put into words how much this book touched me. It chronicles her relationship with her brother...growing up with him, her life as an adolescent, her journey with him as he struggled to fight a battle against AIDS, and her grieving and finding her way after his ultimate death. This book is right up there with Katrina Vandenberg's Atlas, which is easily not only one of my favorite poetry books, but just one of my favorite books ever. I'll leave you with a poem from What the Living Do and I hope to be back with everyone here again soon!

Pain

He rose on the surface of it like the layers of water on top of a wave
that won't break - you've seen those swells -

cold and moving like something breathing you can't see, collecting and 
collecting until it seems uncontainable, heaving on and on, rising and

rising and growing bigger.
When it got very bad, he'd say, Tell me a story,

and after an hour or so, he'd say, We got through that one, didn't we?

Until a day came when he said, Marie,
you know how we've been waiting for the big pain to come?

I think it's here. I think this is it.
I think it's been here all along.

And he did take the morphine, and he died the next week.

Crap....cried again just typing that up....I love this book. The whole book isn't bleak. But it's true to his and her existence and experience. And it's just one of the most powerful books of poetry I've ever read. 

Taking a Break

Hey Guys...just wanted to let everyone know I'm taking an indefinite break right now from blogging. Things are just overly stressful in life right now and I'm just trying to eliminate as much pressure as I can right now. Not that my friends are ever a burden...please know that NONE of you are!!! You're all the best. But I struggle with feeling guilty if I don't post regularly, comment, respond to emails right away, etc, so I figured this is for the best. Without going into too much detail, my dad's not doing so good again and is going to have to have more surgery which will result in a long hospitalization and recovery time, I have no vacation time to take off from work, and there are some other stressors going on too right now...See y'all soon though hopefully.